When Life Is Overwhelming
When Life Gets to Feeling Like it's All Too Much
Are you at the point where you're just done hearing what other people have to say? Has it ever reached the point where the sound of the television feels like it's an overwhelming noise? Have you ever been so overwhelmed that you couldn't bring yourself to go out or talk to anyone? Have you ever reached the point in a day where, if you have to deal with one more problem, you will either shout or cry?
Frequently, I hear the term "too much" about many things. I have changed the term into something probably not grammatical but expresses what many people experience: "Toomuchness." What is "Toomuchness," I hear you ask? First, I will tell you what it is not:
1. It is not pathological,
2. It is not a mental illness,
3. It is not uncommon,
4. It is not incurable.
So, what is "too muchness?"
It is a state of feeling overwhelmed by too much or too many:
1. Choices to make,
2. Conflict and disagreement,
3. Anxiety-producing situations that feel uncontrollable,
4. Noise as traffic, neighbors, teenagers blasting stereos,
5. Stimuli in the environment besides noise
6. Bad news on television, radio, and newspapers,
7. Family and personal history going back to childhood,
8. Information about what is good and bad for health,
9. Warnings about the end of life on earth,
10. Bills and problems of all kinds and types.
Abusive Childhood, Depression, and too-muchness:
There are many people who, because of chaotic, deprived, and abusive childhoods, experience their daily lives as "too much." For some, the sensation of "too muchness" becomes the source of depression and hopelessness, even leading to suicidal thoughts.
PTSD and Too Muchness:
Some people experienced uneventful childhoods because their family lives were intact and happy. Then, in their adulthood, they experienced something that was overwhelmingly traumatic. Some individuals may have found themselves in the middle of an earthquake, at the wrong end of a gun. They were being robbed and assaulted by a criminal amid a tornado when their house was blown away or in the center of a car bomb explosion in Iraq during combat. For these people, everything that happens after the traumatizing experience is felt as "too muchness."
Everyone and Too muchness:
A person does not have to have been through these experiences to suffer from "too muchness." In an era of instant communication, when we learn news and information from the far corners of the earth, it is easy to experience the sense of "too muchness." There are also endless varieties of the same product when shopping. Even if they read about products before shopping, many people feel overwhelmed by the varieties and types.
The Way We Are Wired:
It is also important to consider that each individual has a different neurological wiring system. By this, I mean some people are born more able to tolerate stress than others. Of course, there is a point at which anyone and everyone will experience "too muchness." This is sometimes called the "Diathesis-Stress Model" of disease and emotional problems. Here is how it works:
Diathesis-Stress Model- There is a crossing point at which our genetics and the environment combine to cause havoc with our physical and mental health. Each person has a limit to how much stress they can tolerate. Once life's stressful events accumulate to where the genetic capacity has been reached, the person becomes ill. Because this is determined as much by life events as by genetics, the diathesis point is different for each person.
How Are People Affected by Too muchness?
One of the major outcomes of what I am referring to as too muchness is commonly referred to as stress. According to the Oxford American Dictionary, Second Edition, stress is "the state of emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances."
The things that one individual experiences as tension will not be experienced in the same way by someone else. Regardless, certain currents in our modern society cause many people to experience this emotional strain because of the accumulation of demanding circumstances over a lifetime.
Physically and psychologically, there are general complaints affecting people due to this emotional stain. Physically, too many people, and at ever younger ages, are being diagnosed with:
1. High Blood Pressure
2. Diabetes
3. Obesity
4. Heart disease
5. Somatic symptoms include backaches, headaches, stomach distress, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, etc.
Psychologically, people are diagnosed with the following:
1. Depression
2. Anxiety
3. OCD
4. Worry
5. Sleep loss, etc.
What Can You Do About Your Too-muchness?
There are things in life over which we have no control. For example, we cannot influence OPEC nations to produce more oil at cheaper prices. However, we do not have to sit in front of the television news, taking in the lists of murders, rapes, and assaults as the reporters describe the gory details. So, here are some suggestions:
Reducing Too-muchness:
1. Turn off the television and radio news, except, perhaps, to follow the election.
2. Get plenty of exercises. Exercise toughens the body and changes the crossing point (diathesis-stress) before we become ill.
3. Refrain from alcohol and drug abuse. They don't solve problems and, in reality, make things worse.
4. Listen to music. A recent study showed that listening to music for thirty minutes while doing deep breathing exercises reduces blood pressure.
5. If you like movies, see comedies and things you can laugh at. Laughter is a great medication.
6. Do not be a hermit. Talk and socialize with family and friends. Social involvement is a great way to stay healthy.
7. Eat healthy foods. This does not mean you have to starve yourself. No one ever died from having a little ice cream. Please don't make that ice cream treat a daily item; do not gorge yourself on it. (I am using ice cream to represent any food that, if overused, could be bad for health).
8. Get plenty of sleep. Americans are sleep deprived, and that is very unhealthy.
9. Some people get genuine peace and comfort from their religion. For those, it is really important to attend religious services. For those who do not believe in organized religion but feel spiritual, there are many avenues to pursue, including learning Yoga, Buddhism, or other practices.
10. As one great Buddhist teacher said, "If you are washing the dishes, focus on that and nothing else." Live in the moment and appreciate every moment. Smell the coffee, the grass, and the flowers, hear the children play, and live life in its largest and smallest ways.
Help is available.
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